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The love and trust affair

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December 1, 01.15 AM IST

I can’t express how much I love you these days
I wish it was it was only the sex, we had to haste
The moment I gave you a place in my heart
Every time we fought it ripped me to shrapnels apart

I don’t like anger, neither do you?
But I can’t control, the way I am, can you?
You don’t understand how much I love you
You have deep trust paranoia, sad but true

I threw away things that I ever cared for
You misunderstand me, you tell me to fuck off
Be careful next time what you say
Words that hurt, put me in ceaseless dismay

Hell, I can’t fucking count the number of stars
As my body, you left me with so many scars
You asked me to write a poem for you the times we met
Here I am, pouring down my feelings, I am now a whiskey’s pet

You think I am drunk, you think you can blame me
Well, I am slam dunk, you still can’t assume me
I am a man of duty, pride and honor
In love’s court, I plead not guilty your honor!

Past is past, and the past is done, can’t be undone
You can’t recover what’s been said and done
Either we live in the dark, worrying about shattered dreams
Or start a new life spark, with new joyful schemes

I sorry I can’t be like your father or him
I am me! It’s our ego, we both need to trim
At least I have the to courtesy to accept my mistakes
If you confide in me, I don’t have to say you manipulate

Where there is anger, there is intense love
Its fear you monger, allow me to exalt you above
Remember, you used to ask me, "Who am I to you?!"
You realize now, how desperately I am the one who needs you?!

No matter what happens, we are family, we never leave the house
We stick together through our bitterly woes, my spouse
They say two same poles repel each other
We two similar souls, I wonder, can we propel together?

I know, I should learn to treat you better
I am learning, trying hard, and I never regretted
Seems like true care and affection are hard to come by
I happen to think, in my mind they are naturally imbibed

I don’t boast, I am the best you will ever get
I wanna be your dawn to dusk from the sun rise to set
What about my dreams of having kids with you?
You wanna give up, Damn, I thought you thought so too.

Hey baby, don’t you worry, what are you afraid of?
When you have our love to be proud of?!
It’s our life, we gotta live for ourselves
But at first, You gotta start believing in thyself

If I lived for people that will say whatever they say?!
Fuck the society, every fucking dog has its fucking day
You suffer people bitch; you live well, people still bitch
Think, do we have to be their bitch, you bitch?

Baby, I cry when your face strikes my mind
Like it rains, when lightning strikes, so the sky whined
You probably got the same feelings like I do
I object, your claims that you love me more than I do

End of day, it boils down to whether you marry me or not
What will I do, if I don’t tie you the knot?
I gotta ask your parents, how they made you so hot
Especially in bed, when you bring all your naught

You weren’t brought up like me, I will do my best
But, when I am off the edge, you gotta learn to adjust
My mom, your mom, my father, your father
They don’t matter to me anymore as they are farther

I am tired of people around you bleeding you dry
When you run out of money, guess what? They sigh
All our dreams comes don’t come true like in a story book
In real life, you gotta little bit broaden your outlook

I get angry cause it’s about your wellbeing I care
Don’t you question my love and trust, don’t you dare!
I recon I have to be an even kinder man
Or what’s the difference between me and a garbage can?

It’s the love we need to cherish
Not the arguments that will let us perish
None of my words here are meant to piss you
You don’t trust me? hah! I still miss you

It’s surprising that I let another girl become my priority
Sometimes I feel I loaned myself some hypocrisy
Like I don’t follow what I preach
Then I realize, it’s my code, I breached

My love is pure like the orgasm we have, you know it
Thank you for loving me back, to you I owe it
I can’t hold on to my leash when you are naked
Our sexual hormones we unleash, we become sacred

We always fight about our possessiveness, and forgiveness
But now you starting to question my trust, my highness?
I am sitting here thinking about the taint spew on my trust
Labelling me to be stingy and causing unrest

You think its money after all to me that’s important
Let alone my compassion, let it lay dormant
You think I don’t trust you for the loan money
It’s funny, retrospect, is that all you understand me, my honey?

Who should you give money or not? Wishing well for you is my fault?!
When you finger it as my shortcoming and start an assault
My actions may be frenzy, do you fail to see my intentions?
I don’t give up, though I am fed up of these tensions!

The day we give up, our family dies
Worse than a corpse fed by maggot flies
It’s our relationship, we respect
If we are true, ain’t no room for suspect

There is nothing wrong in saving for oneself and being selfish
Though I don’t mean we become scavenger fetish
It’s time we start saving for our marriage
And correct the abortion and all the papaya miscarriage

You like a flower that is soft to even fondly touch
Am I a gardener, not qualified to owe you as such?
I don’t want you be my next failed episode
Hence I write you and dedicate my profound ode

Tit for tat, ain’t gonna make our bonding work
I bash, many times I know I too can be too curt
Will I ever get another partner like you miss?
I still beg you pardon I promise

I know I hurt you too, that’s why I said I am a hypocrite
I want to apologize too, and express my plight
I pretty much had to say what I had in mind
In time you will comprehend the true meaning of my rhyme

-rotandripe

 

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Written by gmaran23

December 1, 2016 at 1:16 am

Posted in literature, love, poems, quotes, rage

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Oxymora and Paradoxes from Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare

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This is such a wonderful, passionate, and incredible list of Oxymora and Paradoxes that Romeo tries to gather  himself as he’s sitting at the beach. The rendition of the dialogue by Romeo (Leo DiCaprio) which is partly edited in the movie Romeo + Juliet will directly communicate with your senses and talk to you, if you have that penchant for art and movies. Later, you might go back to your book and read the dialogue aloud yourself. While you are at it, if you just want to conjure up, you don’t essentially need to be in love with someone or something; from my point of view, this dialogue – besides being a bunch of words contradicting themselves – should frantically appeal to you at your solitary viewpoint.

 

….

….

Here’s much to do with hate, but more with love
Why, then, O brawling love! O loving hate!
O any thing, of nothing first create!
O heavy lightness, serious vanity!
Mis-shapen chaos of well-seeming forms!
Feather of lead, bright smoke, cold fire, sick health!
Still-waking sleep, that is not what is is!
This love feel I, that feel no love in this.

Written by gmaran23

June 1, 2013 at 9:23 am

Better man in paradise land …

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Written back in 2011 mid December I guess, for my friend Shelly, when we shared a moment. Already a song with some nice music. Some parts of it, I could allow to be called exaggeration, while some of it are just what it means. One of the best buddies I have at work, I could go on and on, if you get me started.. so, here it is, rot, and ripe.

 

Better man in Paradise land

You crawled in to my brain and read everything
what do I hide from you now? except for nothing

you took a stroll down my memory lane
leaving your footprints driving me insane

am I too happy because I have found a friend?
am I still sloppy because my troubles can never end?

—-
I am excited to be here with you
I am glad for I have become a better man

I am excited to be here with you
Another good day holding your hands
—-

Why is the sun shining at me so bright
while the breeze cuddles like she’s holding me tight

When I was falling she caught me right in the air
Beat me and taught me that she always cares

Would you let me worship you from my ivory tower?
Lock me up darling, can we stay in this moment forever?

—-
I am excited to be here with you
I am glad for I have become a better man

I am excited to be here with you
Earning my way to the paradise land
—-

you.. you.. you.. you

You crawled in to my brain and read everything
what do I hide from you now? except for nothing

you took a stroll down my memory lane
leaving your footprints driving me insane

am I too happy because I have found a friend?
am I still sloppy because my troubles can never end?

—-
I am excited to be here with you
I am glad for I have become a better man

I am excited to be here with you
Earning my way to the paradise land
—-

-rotandripe

 

oh yeah, that ivory tower part was borrowed from Eddie Vedder’s Hard Sun.

 

BetterMan

Written by gmaran23

January 18, 2013 at 6:07 pm

Posted in literature, love, poems, quotes

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I pray for you .. my truelove

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It’s been a long time since I wrote a song, a complete set of free flowing thoughts that I could call a song – way back in July 2012 I think. Many bits and pieces I wrote, un-organizized. Something happened, something  provoked and stirred me up today, beyond my apathy apathetic laziness to write this down. This is version one and bound to succumb many changes as I play some guitar strums for it. so, here is is raw, rot, and ripe.

 

I pray for you

———————————————————-

Ever since the day we walked down the aisle
Couldn’t know that my living would be worthwhile

My loneliness’s eluded with the tenderness of your touch
Every morning while we woke up with fingers clutched

It’s your innocence that constantly drew me towards you
I realized the meaning of ecstasy when I lay beside you

———————————————————
I seem to pray; I seem to trust in my prayers
I pray for you to be with me in eternity
I pray for a world made only for you and me
———————————————————

The perfection in crafting your body and mind
Willingly beguiled me to claim every bit of you, mine

The warmth in your heart attested to sheer comfort
Cleansed me off my hatred and bitterly discomforts

Glued by this inexplicable nature, we shared love
Parting from you would’ve been my last day, my truelove

———————————————————
I seem to pray; I seem to trust in my prayer
I pray for strength with you as my armor
I pray for you to be with me in eternity
I pray for a world made only for you and me
———————————————————

 

– rotandripe

Written by gmaran23

January 18, 2013 at 5:42 pm

Posted in literature, love, poems, quotes

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